Want to hear something funny? Of course you do. Who does not like to laugh?
It's something we regularly seek out, finding things that make us laugh or looking for ways to amuse others. And what could be better than making your baby laugh for the first time or letting your child cackle uncontrollably?
Parents, especially fathers, rely on humor to connect with their children. There's even a popular term for the kind of jokes dads like to tell (you know, the ones that lead to loud groans and lots of eye rolling). They are more appropriately called "dad jokes". According to a Wall Street Journal article, dad jokes likely help build closer relationships between fathers and their children.
Many people have studied and documented all the benefits of laughter. Not only can a good giggle potentially lower blood pressure, lower stress hormone levels, improve heart health and boost immunity, but it's even being researched to herald an abdominal workout as one of the benefits of laughter.
Imagine: You can skip a workout if you laugh enough.
Can it be true that humor also makes you a better parent? We got some insights from fathers and mothers in metro Detroit to get a better feel.
Humor in dealing with challenges
David Rosenthal is a rabbi and father of five children, ages 10 months to 12 years old. This Oak Park dad uses humor to overcome some of the many challenges of parenthood.
Since discipline can be stressful for both parents and children, Rosenthal believes it benefits everyone to release tension in meaningful and appropriate ways. It's not that he doesn't discipline; he just approaches it differently.
"I noticed that the more I tried to control my children, the less effective I was as a father. The hard part has been figuring out how to overcome challenges with creativity, and the creativity I go to is humor, " he says. "Instead of being confrontational, I now use humor."
For example, when his kids don't want to take a bath, they usually get stuck refusing to get in the tub and just focus on how they don't want to take a bath. If Rosenthal can open her mind with a little humor, he says, it gets her "past the speed bump and more ready to be corporate".
How does he do it? A little bathroom humor (like a gas noise) works well, but he also gets a lot of mileage out of tickling them.
Finding the funny in everyday life
West Bloomfield's mom Marci Stifter brings humor to almost everything she does. It has always been her way to connect with others, including her equally sarcastic husband Mark and her sons Luke (15) and Jack (13).
"I don't know anything but sarcasm and laughter," says Stifter, a mortgage broker who performs stand-up comedy once a month at some metro Detroit comedy clubs. "Nothing makes me happier than when I can literally make my boys laugh from the gut, just like their friends could make them laugh. If I can do that, I feel like I've accomplished something special. "
Family banter keeps things interesting at Stifter's West Bloomfield home. For example, Marci keeps a grocery list on Alexa, and between eggs and bread, it's not uncommon to hear something like "Luke's a jerk" or "Jack's a jerk". No one gets offended because they know everything is fun.
That's not to say that discipline doesn't exist or that the Founders boys can get away with bad behavior. When this mom tries to make a point, she does so in a way that lets her teens know how serious she is while still incorporating humor. She is also careful not to embarrass anyone.
Improv as a way of life
For PJ Jacokes, a Pleasant Ridge father of two, improv is as much a comedy style as a way of life. Jacokes is co-owner of Go Comedy! Improv Theatre in Ferndale, where he also works as a producer, comedian and teaches improv classes.
When Jacokes teaches improvisation to adults, he often says it's about showing them how to play. Children, he says, have a much easier time being creative and using their imaginations.
At home, he and his wife Lisa play lots of improv games with their two boys, Dax (14) and Fletcher (2), and offer a few tips for parents who want to incorporate more laughter into their family dynamic.
For example, when playing board games, Jacokes suggests being spontaneous and having fun rather than focusing on the rules. He also recommends playing improv games. One of their favorites is called "Doctor Know it All," where they go around the table and each add a word to answer a question.
If the question is, "What's the best birthday present ever??"Family members take turns adding a word to the sentence until the sentence is complete. No matter what the answer, even if it's a broken toe, they embrace every idea and that builds confidence and generates laughter, Jacokes says.
Other ways these families incorporate humor into their lives is by watching comedies together and sharing experiences that are unique to their families, also known as inside jokes.
Dealing with everyday stress
Humor also helps parents deal with the daily stressors that often come with parenthood.
For example, Rosenthal was recently a single parent while his wife was out of the country on a nine-day work trip. During this time, her baby came down with a stomach virus and had to be changed and bathed several times a day.
Instead of complaining about a child covered with feces, Rosenthal tried to find ways to shed light on the situation.
"A sense of humor is crucial for a fulfilling life, because it's exhausting to take everything too seriously. Even in sad situations, it is easier to find a way to smile ", explains Jacokes. When his mother died a few years ago, laughing together helped them get through such a difficult time.